Breathe

Acrylic paint | Canvas | 40x50cm

Breathe. Inhale. Exhale. All will be okay. Thoughts racing, heart pumping. Lungs collapsing and palms sweating. Body goes numb. Sometimes. I’m not here. I’m here but I’m not.

Breathe. Inhale. Exhale. I’m here but I’m not. Arms tingling, legs heavy. Eyes thick and tears forming. Drowning. But I’m on land.

Breathe. Inhale. Exhale. You’re okay. You’re safe. I’m here. Am I? Hand on heart.

Breathing slower. Landing. Grounding. Floating. Lighter now. You’re okay. You’re safe. I’m here.

Just breathe. Warmer. Calmer now. Nothing happened. But chaos happened. Did it? It’s okay. You’re okay. It happens. Sometimes.

But I’m here. You’re safe. Don’t leave. Don’t leave me. Please. Gone. Panic. Again.

Just fucking breathe. BREATHE. Why do you do this? Why?! I don’t know. Hands on heart. Nails in skin. Tears dropping. Body imploding. No one loves you. No one ever has. What if no one ever will?

A gasp for air. Exhale. Slowly. Inhale. Deeply. Pause. It’s okay. It’ll be okay. I’m here. I’m you. I’ll never leave. I can’t.

So we’re here. Together. Always. Because I love you. I wish you would love you too. But that’ll come. For now.

Just breathe. Inhale. Exhale.